Believing

I heard and believed. I was a kid, hearing the Bible’s teachings from my parents and other grown-ups who had my parents’ stamp of approval. I never doubted that the Bible is “capital ‘T’ True.” Granted, the “trust” aspect of belief was more complicated, and it took a while for me to become settled re: the issue of my own salvation. But re: the “intellectual assent” aspect of belief, I never doubted that the Bible is God’s Word, and I never doubted that the God of the Bible is the one true God.

Of course the time came when I began to face the hard questions: why do I believe the Bible to be “capital ‘T’ Truth”? Why do I believe the Bible to be uniquely the Word of God to the exclusion of the books of the other religions? For these forty or so years I’ve tried to stay honest with myself, holding the Bible and my faith up for examination in the face of valid questions. But this examining of the evidence took place after belief, and has served to corroborate – not convince. Somehow I was already convinced.

I can describe my “experience of believing” as an inner, unshakeable conviction that there is a “ring of truth” about the Bible. I have this surprisingly settled assurance that the Bible is God’s written revelation in which he tells us who he is and what he is up to. Yes, my experience of believing is subjective; it’s just what is happening in me. So I don’t pretend that it has the kind of clout to intellectually convince anyone else. And while I call it “unshakeable,” in no way do I feel trapped against my will. I can’t shake it, and I love it. I recognize that I’m accountable to it, and I love it. I’ve surrendered to it, and I love it.

But my experience of believing—never doubting the truth of the Bible—how crazy is that? If I could have written the script, the Jim Paulson story would have included years of wide-ranging, deep, agonizing, intellectual searching, giving all competing systems a fair hearing, and finally landing me in a relationship with Jesus. Obviously, that is not the Jim Paulson story. Rather, to lean on Donald Miller’s expression, faith just seemed to find me.

So I ask again about my experience of believing: how crazy is it? I think maybe only as crazy as God’s crazy ways. In the Bible, I’m seeing a human side and a divine side to the experience of believing. Humanly, “hearing” is the key. “Faith comes from hearing” (Romans 10:17). Divinely, “shining” is the key. “For God, who said, ‘Let light shine out of darkness,’ has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ” (2 Corinthians 4:6).

I heard and believed. I think that my simple experience of believing sounds rather foolish. But I think it makes God look very good. When I heard the Truth, God made it shine.